"Hey! check this out!"
A tow headed boy races his bicycle toward the lake. He speeds across the dock and over the ramp, as the others watch.
SPLASH! The boy and the bicycle hit the water as one.
He floats to the surface drenched and still holding onto the handle bars. An explosion of laughter erupts.
"Did you see that??!!"
At that moment the he is totally free and enjoying life without constraint.
He is the eldest son and his father is the local pastor; a double whammy of expectations are on this poor child. He is free spirited, creative and loves people. Sometimes he doesn't fit the mold of being a well mannered boy of a minister. And so, he learns what is acceptable as he tries to please his parents. They are good parents who love their son, but just like every other person in this world, they are imperfect.
During his childhood, he feels there is no place in which to share the full spectrum of his emotions. As a result, he learns to stuff his true self deep down inside of him.
This boy is athletic and does well in several sports, which is a plus, because his dad is a sports fan. He has no problem making friends and does fairly well in school.
During high school, some of his old boyhood friends get involved with the party lifestyle. Since the teen's spiritual life has grown flat and unfulfilling, he chooses to join his buddies. The inner self grows hollow as the false self builds a really nice facade. Deep inside is an ache to return to his true self. The still small Voice calls to him, but he has begun to believe in the phony outward image of himself.
He survives a few major setbacks during his early adulthood and comes out shining as a wonderful example of a good, Christian man. He still loves people, and is very likable. He is confident, social and fun loving, but rarely shows emotion. He can easily speak to groups of fellow believers about spiritual matters and is successful in full time Christian work. His false exterior has become a man who is highly esteemed. And by all standards he is a very good person, with nothing to hide.
Only his young bride perceives that she doesn't really know the true man. She longs to know his genuine heart. Yet she is insecure and usually doubts her feelings. It must be her problem, she thinks, because everyone loves her husband. How can she find fault in such a cherished Christian? After all he is a very good husband and father. Still... she feels empty, there is a void. She desires a deep heart connection with her man.
To make things more complicated, she is burdened with baggage from her past which clouds her self image and security.
These two broken people survive marriage for over 25 years, still truly in love, but not free from problems.
During their 26th year of marriage, a test like never before rocks them. Because of their commitment to each other and to God, they decide to dig deep and search for answers. They want to understand what made them vulnerable. It is a difficult, roller coaster ride, but they choose to travel together seeking their Heavenly Father's help. The Wonderful Counselor does His work, but the healing process is not without pain. The man is brought face to face with his false self. In humbleness he discovers that his wife is not the only broken one in their relationship. He begins to face the wounds from his past. As his heart begins to thaw, it unleashes feelings that he hasn't felt in years. He reclaims his emotions and feels more alive. Much to his wife's utter joy, he begins to share his heart with her. She is introduced to the inner man that had been concealed from her for years. She no longer feels the disconnect that they had for most of their marriage.
Her love for him grows even deeper and his love for her blooms as his emotions are set free.
As they journey together, they continue to heal & grow, hand in hand, heart to heart walking with their Abba father.
“There is a beautiful transparency to honest disciples who never wear a false face and do not pretend to be anything but who they are.”
― Brennan Manning
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